What’s Your Number?

In 2018, Slack was hurtling toward a pivotal moment. We were pushing hard on new product launches, partnerships announcements, global expansion, revenue growth and readying the company for a public listing. It was crunch time. Everyone felt it (I know I sure did). We were all sprinting and every day mattered. In the midst of this whirlwind, my wife and I welcomed twin daughters into our lives.

Thankfully, Slack was an incredible company to navigate this season of life. Great parental leave, empathetic leadership, and a culture of fellow parents who genuinely understood the chaos of juggling work and family. But even with these supportive structures in place, our life was pure chaos. Every day was a fire drill both at home and the office, and most days both of us were running on empty.

During this intense period, my wife and I stumbled onto a simple yet surprisingly powerful practice: we began asking each other, “What’s your number?”

This wasn’t planned and we didn’t create a rubric or scale. It was just a quick description of what was present. For example:

• 10 meant, “I’m doing amazing—full of energy, clear-headed, ready for anything.”
• 1 meant, “I have nothing left to give. I’m about to break.”

There was no set schedule or expectation; we simply checked in when it felt needed, sometimes multiple times a day (it’s amazing how quickly energy levels can slide after a botched nap time or back-to-back-to-back Zoom calls). This quick calibration allowed us to instantly gauge where the other person stood and adjust our approach accordingly. It revealed moments when one of us needed more support or when we both simply needed more patience and grace with each other and ourselves.

Think of it like monitoring your heart rate zones during a run. You can push into zone 5 for short, controlled bursts, but you can’t live there indefinitely without consequences. The same goes for stress and the pace at which you work and live.

Checking in gave us clarity. If one of us was struggling at a 2 and the other had a little more in the tank, we knew exactly who needed to step up. On days we were both depleted, it became a powerful reminder to extend patience and grace—both to each other and ourselves. Most importantly, it created space for honest conversation, reinforcing that we were truly in this together.

This practice also helped us step back and re-evaluate the support systems and structures in our lives. If one of us was running on empty for too long, it wasn’t just about the other person stepping up; it sparked deeper conversations about self-care, personal time, or adjusting things like childcare schedules. The same idea applies at work. If a team member consistently shares a low number it can be a prompt to rethink workloads, redistribute projects, or facilitate a conversation to see if there’s something happening in their personal life that’s effecting how they show up and manage work.

Now, with our twins grown and a new baby daughter recently joining the family, we’ve dusted off this tactic once again. Whether you’re navigating the relentless sprint of startup life or balancing the demands of home, knowing your number—and checking in on the numbers of your team or loved ones—can make a difference.

How Leaders Can Use This at Work

This isn’t just for home. If you’re a founder, CEO, or team leader, “What’s your number?” is a simple but amazing tool for quickly gauging how your team is really doing. Here are a few ways to bring it into your company:

• Daily stand-ups: Kick off the meeting by having everyone quickly share their number. It sets the tone and helps you spot anyone who might need extra support or who could take on more.
• Weekly exec team meetings: Use it as a pulse check at the start or end of the meeting. If several leaders are running low, it could be a signal to slow down or redistribute work before something breaks.
• 1:1s with direct reports: Opening a 1:1 by asking for a number is an easy way to create space for honesty about both work and life outside of it.
• Offsites or retreats: Use it as an icebreaker or energy check. You’ll get a sense of where the group stands, and people will feel seen.

I know it’s simple. And you’ve probably heard or used it before but it’s intuitive and powerful when done at the right time. Just like a well-timed heart rate check during an endurance run, “What’s your number?” helps ensure you and your team are in it for the long haul and not burning out after a few sprints.

Give it a try. I think you might be surprised at the clarity and connection that comes from this small but meaningful question.